IB/hfi1: Use aborts to trigger RC throttling

SDMA and pio flushes will cause a lot of packets to be transmitted
after a link has gone down, using a lot of CPU to retransmit
packets.

Fix for RC QPs by recognizing the flush status and:
- Forcing a timer start
- Putting the QP into a "send one" mode

Fixes: 77241056 ("IB/hfi1: add driver files")
Reviewed-by: Kaike Wan <kaike.wan@intel.com>
Signed-off-by: Mike Marciniszyn <mike.marciniszyn@intel.com>
Signed-off-by: Dennis Dalessandro <dennis.dalessandro@intel.com>
Signed-off-by: Doug Ledford <dledford@redhat.com>