RDMA/ucma: Fix uABI structure layouts for 32/64 compat

The rdma_ucm_event_resp is a different length on 32 and 64 bit compiles.

The kernel requires it to be the expected length or longer so 32 bit
builds running on a 64 bit kernel will not work.

Retain full compat by having all kernels accept a struct with or without
the trailing reserved field.

Signed-off-by: Jason Gunthorpe <jgg@mellanox.com>