nfp: bpf: allow control message sizing for map ops

In current ABI the size of the messages carrying map elements was
statically defined to at most 16 words of key and 16 words of value
(NFP word is 4 bytes).  We should not make this assumption and use
the max key and value sizes from the BPF capability instead.

To make sure old kernels don't get surprised with larger (or smaller)
messages bump the FW ABI version to 3 when key/value size is different
than 16 words.

Signed-off-by: Jakub Kicinski <jakub.kicinski@netronome.com>
Signed-off-by: Daniel Borkmann <daniel@iogearbox.net>