svcrdma: Add a "deferred close" helper

Refactor a bit of commonly used logic so that every site that wants
a close deferred to an nfsd thread does all the right things
(set_bit(XPT_CLOSE) then enqueue).

Also, once XPT_CLOSE is set on a transport, it is never cleared. If
XPT_CLOSE is already set, then the close is already being handled
and the enqueue can be skipped.

Signed-off-by: Chuck Lever <chuck.lever@oracle.com>