IB/rxe: Reuse code which sets port state

Same code is executed in both rxe_param_set_add and rxe_notify functions.
Make one function and call it from both places.

Since both callers already have a rxe object use it directly instead of
deriving it from the net device.

Signed-off-by: Yuval Shaia <yuval.shaia@oracle.com>
Reviewed-by: Steve Wise <swise@opengridcomputing.com&gt; >
Reviewed-by: Bart Van Assche <bart.vanassche@wdc.com>
Signed-off-by: Jason Gunthorpe <jgg@mellanox.com>