mm: make find_extend_vma() fail if write lock not held

Make calls to extend_vma() and find_extend_vma() fail if the write lock
is required.

To avoid making this a flag-day event, this still allows the old
read-locking case for the trivial situations, and passes in a flag to
say "is it write-locked".  That way write-lockers can say "yes, I'm
being careful", and legacy users will continue to work in all the common
cases until they have been fully converted to the new world order.

Co-Developed-by: Matthew Wilcox (Oracle) <willy@infradead.org>
Signed-off-by: Matthew Wilcox (Oracle) <willy@infradead.org>
Signed-off-by: Liam R. Howlett <Liam.Howlett@oracle.com>
Signed-off-by: Linus Torvalds <torvalds@linux-foundation.org>