netfilter: prefer extension check to pointer check

The pointer check usually results in a 'false positive': its likely
that the ctnetlink module is loaded but no event monitoring is enabled.

After recent change to autodetect ctnetlink usage and only allocate
the ecache extension if a listener is active, check if the extension
is present on a given conntrack.

If its not there, there is nothing to report and calls to the
notification framework can be elided.

Signed-off-by: Florian Westphal <fw@strlen.de>
Signed-off-by: Pablo Neira Ayuso <pablo@netfilter.org>